Helping Your Toddler Feel Safe & Ready
Toilet training after constipation or withholding can feel like starting over — but it’s a fresh chance to rebuild trust, comfort, and positive routines around the toilet.
This guide focuses on helping your toddler feel confident, safe, and in control.
Main Goals:
- Encourage soft, regular poos to reduce fear
- Make toilet time relaxed, fun, and pressure-free
- Build predictable daily habits that help toileting feel normal
- Support emotional resilience and independence
Step 1: Familiarisation (Weeks 1–2)
Focus on gently reintroducing the toilet or potty as a safe and comfortable place.
- Use a child-friendly seat insert and footstool for secure posture
- Try short sits after meals or before a bath (no pressure to go)
- Read books about toileting and play with toys who ‘use’ the toilet
- Let them flush, help wipe, and wash hands — build comfort with the whole process
📚 Try reading: “Where Does My Poo Go?” — a toddler-friendly story to normalise the process.
Sample Daily Toilet Routine
- Wake up → Breakfast → Toilet sit
- Lunch → Toilet sit
- Before bath → Toilet sit
Even if nothing happens, this repetition helps build rhythm and reduces anxiety.
Step 2: Helping Them Relax
Tension can stop a poo in its tracks. Help your toddler relax:
- Add a small basket of toys/books just for toilet time
- Blow bubbles or use a kazoo or pinwheel — blowing encourages deep breaths and relaxation
- Fidget toys or poppers to hold
🎵 Focus on fun and calm — not outcome.
Step 3: Use Positive Language
- Say: “Let’s go have a little sit” rather than “Do you need a poo?”
- Praise effort: “You listened to your body!” instead of “Good girl”
- Use visual routines to show what comes next
🎉 Consider a sticker chart that rewards toilet sits, handwashing, and flushing.
Step 4: Offer Autonomy & Emotional Safety
- Give choices: “Do you want to climb up or shall I help you?”
- Stay neutral: “That’s okay, we’re learning” after accidents
- Avoid pressure or bribes — this is about confidence, not control
Step 5: Watch for Readiness Signs (Usually from Week 3+)
Your toddler might be ready to try without nappies when they:
- Stay dry for longer periods
- Tell you they’re wet or about to go
- Show interest in the toilet or your routines
Start with short nappy-free windows and keep expectations low-pressure.
Bonus: Movement, Posture & Natural Support
- Daily active play supports digestion
- Use a footstool so knees are higher than hips when sitting
- If considering probiotics or herbal remedies, consult a specialist (e.g. Napiers Clinic)
Final Thoughts
Toilet training after constipation takes time and compassion — but with the right tools and tone, your toddler can regain confidence.
💛 You’ve got this — and if you’d like help setting up routines, sticker charts or personalised support, I’m always here.
📩 Reach out any time!